Whining and excuses

Its about time I need to get my head straight about this job.

I was randomly selected by them through JobStreet. I accepted the job though it was not my cup of tea. Logistic in an interesting field. Lots of new things to learn everyday but I dont seem to be absorbing them. Somehow I am shutting myself out from learning. The reason? My brain cant give me an answer. Maybe because I'm not interested? Maybe because I dont really care what happens? Maybe because I'm still at studying phase & not taking my job as serious I should be but the phase should be over it by now, it has been 5 months since my last exam. Hmmm . .

It has been 4 months - I gave an impression that I don't seem to be enthusiastic about my work through the feedback. Ugh. Also, my performance has been going up and down like a coaster ride. To the boss, my performance is like the weather. The sun shines and then rain and then the sun shines again. In conclusion, inconsistency which is something I have to work on.

So whats next?

• Find my passion really quick?
• Strive for excellence in what I do?
• To work on my pro-activeness. Ugh. Make time to be proactive no matter how busy I am :/
• Stop making excuses.
• Start caring for what I do.

Will I make it?

I hope I am not doing this job for the sake of filling up my time. *ask self*

I hope I can prove myself wrong before its too late.

People pay for your ability. Do what more than what you're supposed to.

*Note to self : A new week is starting. Full speed ahead? I better be. Bleh.