Emo day

Today I was awake with a really touching message that I became stunned the whole day. I feel so so loved and cared for. I ran out of words of how I am feeling exactly right now.

I realised I am falling deeper into this person as days pass and I cannot imagine myself loosing him one day. Thinking of him just now made me shed tears. As a matter of fact, all the raining today didnt help me feel any better.

From the start, I knew this wont be easy due to distance, but I didnt want to do something that I might regret. I am glad I did it.

Thinking of how sweet this person is, brightens up my day and keeps me strong. But not today. Today is emo day.

I wish I wish I could be there. Just by your side.

Its Jetlag!!

This morning, I woke up after my alarm rang 1 hour. My whole body felt really tired somehow and alil headache in between. I think I know why, I havent been getting enough rest since then and I want to blame the jetlag effect for excuse.

This is what I found about definitnion of jetlag.

"Jet lag is the curse of modern jet travel, resulting in loss of working efficiency and holiday enjoyment, often for days after arrival."

I am interested particularly at the statement "Often for dayssss". Ooooo. Aha! A perfect excuse reason for me to laze around for the next 1 week. Lolx.

Speaking of which, this week hasnt been easy. I have been on a serious addiction. I realised it's getting worse but I dont feel like getting rid of this addiction although I know I should. XD

Hope

It is really funny how it all started and how we became like now. Although I wished it could have been earlier, but one cant be too greedy right. It could have been not the same as it is. We should appreciate what we have.

Although it will be tough, I just hope things would be fine in the end.

Hope. Patience. Effort. And trust.

How I feel

It has been 4 days since I am back home, the country where I belong to, Malaysia. Although it has been 4 days , I only spend 1 day at home with my family. Actually, make it half a day only. I feel so so bad and sad having to leave right away.

I felt like I was running away from home. Gosh.

Since I entered USM, I have never spend quality time with dad and mum cos I rarely go home. With things in hand and tiredness from those long journey, I didnt go home as often. I only go home once every semester starts?

Thats why whenever I am home, dad welcomes me with a big big smile. In other hand, mum welcomes me with homecook food, a warm smile and questionsss. Lolx. With my bros, we usually spend the day and night talking about almost everything. We share whatever that has happened for the past 1 semester then laugh at them.

I miss those moments right now. 1 semester has passed and I am still not at home. I miss them so much now.

And also my countless huggable pillow. =.=

Snacking is BAD!

Tonight was a bad bad night (drama-ing). Just because I was tempted with a bottle of peanut butter at first, there was more snacks that was offered after that. OMG!! It was really tempting, I couldnt resist it!! Huhu.

No no, I dont want midnight snacks!! It is bad for health. Boooo!! I should take care bcos someone ask me to. Lolx.

Chan2, I am blaming you for this. Its all your fault.

Temptation is a sin. Food is devil.

Lesson learnt

Hello, yes, it is me again. Just wanted to share my thoughts during the 10 hours flight. XD

I was mistaken as a Japanese again. This identity never goes away huh. Boooo. I am pretty dark to be a Japanese le. Whateverrr.

I cant believe

• how nice strangers can be to each other, quite caring person I would say
• how persistent one person can be. Gosh
• how can someone keep saying he fell in love with a person for like 5 times to someone they just know in less than 3 hours?

Findings : Laos and Thai people can understand each other with their language whereas Cambodia and Thai cant. Ooooh. (My first encounter with a Cambodian, looks like Sarawak-ien, nice friendly person also)

I know, in future, I aint going to be so nice to strangers anymore esp guys. No smiles, no friendly talk. Blekk.

Maybe This

Flying from Frankfurt Airport alone was such a bore. Couldnt help walking around in circles while waiting for time to pass. So much things ran through my head while waiting for boarding and I solved a mystery that I have been wandering lately.

I used to share my everyday life no matter how silly or stupid it is with anyone. Then something happened in between and somehow because of that, I felt "betrayed" without me realizing it. Since then, my system shuts down and decides not to share my life anymore. No more happy-go- lucky, no more carefree Ching , whats left was just a pretentious smiley Ching. Sigh.

Being lied to once and then finding it out is so bad. Blekkk. Me no loike this.

Maybe I should start to learn to not expect so much from a new friendship to avoid disappointment. Entah.

For U two

Since the random meet up in Dragon Markt, we have became closer to each other and more emotionally attached as days passed. We spend more time together to the extend we crashed at their place every now and then. =)) 

I am really grateful to have them both in my life although it was a short one. They have made me feel like I was home in a foreign country. Nothing could describe how glad I am to know them. Honestly I wasnt feeling so homesick-ish bcos of you two. Hehe.  Papa und mama. 

Thank you so so much for everything. From friendship to advice to your time to your kindness to the awesome outings to your splendid cooking to your pampering to your spoiling for this 3 months. It has been great. 

One of my ways to express my gratitude. Blogging! I wanted to blogged about it to thank you. Hehe. SURPRISEE!!     Terharu ke tak? Nangis la. Hehehehe. 

Personally I will miss you both when I reach home. Lets keep in touch virtually for now till we meet again in Malaysia. Cepat-cepat la balikkk!! Then we boleh visit Johor, Singapore, Penang and K.Terengganu sama-sama. Should be fun and full of laughters. Hehe. 

I realized

I agree with this statement. People and feelings are complicated. This two elements made one´s life more interesting. 

Confusion is part of life isnt it? When something hit you by surprise , your mouth just open with a gasp then you crack your head thinking what you should do and not do next. After you think you have decided, you stumbled upon doubtful situation. Swt. And the thought if it was all the right thing to do comes along. YAY! Gosh. 

It is not helpful when the word IF decides to come along into the story cos it make ones life more miserable thinking too much about some matters that makes the situation become uncontrollable suddenly. 

In the end, it is all what one truly wants and how one truly feels. Being honest with your own feelings is always the best. Forget about right or wrong. Forget about doubts. Forget about IFs. Just do it and go along with the flow. Dont be afraid of what future might hold cos you are the one that make the difference in the end. Faith is just merely faith. 

Live life as if there is no tomorrow. Do what you want, say what you need to say so that regrets dont haunt you for life.  Make your decision. Beat your doubts.    

Decisions. How nice if we could just decide our life with a flip of a coin. But do you really want a coin to decide your life? 

I have make some decisions. Whats next? Be good or bad, I will face it with an open mind. 

Home to be

What to do once I get home? 

First priority is to sleep like a pig for a few hours before indulging on seafood for dinner. Hopefully dad didnt forget about his promise to pamper me with fabulous seafood. Huhu. 

Next, is to indulge on mom´s tong shui if mum loves me enough to cook it for me. I want my favourite barley fuchuk.  

Next day, a field car trip with beloved Ubi and Chan-chan. I cant wait. Hopefully they forget about cooking me in my sleep. Sighs. 

Thoughts ?

While typing this post, I was listening to this song while remisnicing the past memory. Somehow I couldnt help smiling away thinking how cute, how silly and how gentle your eye stares were. The lyrics blends in naturally how I am feeling now and back then. 

As much as I am excited about this, I have alil fear deep inside growing. It seems too ... i dont know the word describing how I feel. Is this called the fear of losing something that means something to you or .  . . ? Can I pretend that this fear is not here so that I wont have to think about it and let things go with the flow? 

Having no expectations are sometimes the best remedy to reduce disappointment, to a certain extent. Blek. 

Goner

Sometimes you have that feeling that you get pulled into that hole slowly and somehow or rather you just feel like you cant be saved anymore even with ropes there lying there for you and you yourself conciously is willing to sink into that hole. 

What have I gotten myself into? 

How long will this last? It has to be both ways right? XD 

Doubts of Thoughts

To be honest, I am still in doubt if what I have done was the best or the right thing looking at time perspective. (Doubting myself is one of my weaknesses) The complication after this will not be easy to handle due to distance. This hit me by surprise since I am not expecting something like this would have happen. What a shock. X.X

I smile away thinking what future might hold but at the same time, I feel scared as this is not predictable. I feel vulnerable.

Then again, I promise I shall see how it goes. That. I want to have a peek first.

Romeyyy

A day spent in Rome has turned the cute lil fair skin me (ROFL) into one roasted pig, literally. I now have a very sexy skin color with really obvious dividing lines between my arms and shoulders. Gack. In addition my skin feels alil itch from those sun tanning. Sigh.

As much as I want to make my legs dont look so pale and zombee like, I think this sun tanning is alil too much for me to handle right now. Huhu. I cant imagine how burnt I will be at the end of this trip. 6 more days. What if mum and dad cant recognise me in the airport? Like the last time in Munich. OMG! The sadness.

Today was interesting. At the beginning of the day, I was a Japanese (understandable since no sun tanning yet), then I turned into Indonesian (OMG!!! I am so dark alreadyyy, arghh!! Nooooo) then a Korean (this was alil weird cos I was really tanned already. SWT ). Anyway， this was the first time someone actually greeted us with Malay words. I was in disbelief. Lolx.

Oh, the homestay here in Rome has been great. The food cooked by the lady of the house is Yummy. It has this homefeeling thingi that makes me feel like I am home. I am able to blog now because there is computer here for us to use. Hehehe. Extra point to this homestay!! Hehehe. I like!! XP

I am an Internet addict after all.

Short entriiee

I came across this and I kinda liked the way the writer writes it. 

Poetry 

They have some really good ones. 

Wont be connecting to the world for the next 1 week. My last trip. Woot ! I am feeling alil lazy to go anywhere actually currently. Sighs. The excitement is not the same anymore. Sien. 

Movie Hangover

Movie marathon has been a new hobby these days. Yesterday itself we watched 3 movies in a row during the stayover. One thriller movie and two ghost horror movie.

The title of the thriller movie is Friday the 13th. Jason killed almost everyone in a quick matter. Dead. Right through the head. Two was killed s-l-o-w-ly. One burned to death and the other pierced through the neck and skull s-l-o-w-l-y. Eeeeewww!!


Next on the list was a movie from Thailand, title : Coming Soon. This horror movie was about how every cinema staff who watched the movie died in the movie. Spooky! In the movie´s movie back stage, the main actress was hung dead accidentally, the movie crews didnt realise till it´s too late. Damn. Then she came back to kill everyone who watched the movie.

Animation horror movie titled 4bia was next. By the time 4bia was played, adrenaline rush was running all over me. I actually thought why am I watching horror movie and I think I am gonna regret when I am back to Ave. Eeeekkkk!! Huhu. Lets hope I dont hear things when I get back.

That night, I was suddenly haunted by a nightmare that I used to have when I was a kid and it wasnt a good sign, at least for me. I woke up with an empty head and my hands trembling. I dont want to recall what my dream was. =.= 

Today we watched a movie called Hostel. It is a human-torture type of movie where people go to Slovakia and pay to torture. The degree of the torture sums the amount you would need to pay for the torture "experience". This movie is so sick. How can anyone be so inhuman to torture others(innocent people) for personal satisfaction for the hatred that they have towards a nationality. Eeeww eewww eeewwww!!  =( 

You can drown me with any Thai horror movies but not human-torture movie. It hurts me mentally watching people get tortured without any mercy. Argh! Sick sick sick!!!

Its a curse ==

The curse of the bag handle was here in the beginning of the week.

Initially it was Monica´s bag handle that broke. Then mine broke in the night. =.=
Second day in Budapest my lil handbag handle died on me too. WTH!

What a week! Phew.

Saunaa Addiction

My first sauna experience was rather interesting. In Budapest it was I let go of my sauna virginity title. Although with my "condition", I shouldnt be visiting a public hot spring, I went anyway. There was something I could experience which is only sauna. Sigh. No thermal bath, no spa, no jacuzzi, etc but it cost for RM60 so why not? ^^

Initially, I thought there was only one sauna to pick. But I was wrong. There was a variety to pick from. My first sauna was steam sauna. I felt like a oversteamed pao in it. It was uber hot in the room. All I could see was just kabus-fog. I keep coming in and out from the room like 3-4 times before I could actually sit in for about 2-3 minutes. You know, some uncles laughed at my actions of walking in and out. Huhu. But I lasted 2-3 minutes!! Woot!! There was one uncle who looked like a red cooked lobster after he came out from the steaming room. OMG!

Now, I know how hot hell could feel like. Panas nak mampus!!

After walking around for a bit, we found more sauna to experience. Hehe. In total, I experienced five six. ^^

There was one cute aunty we bumped into at SzeChengYi (name of the public hot spring). She kept inviting us to do water aerobics with her and the geng but I cant. I wouldnt mind joining them but I dont want unnecessary attention of the water color after that dont I?

She actually walked us around and recommended what to do after her aerobic session ended. Hehe. She is so so cute and nice and friendly that it reminded me of my late grandma. I miss her.

The other five sauna rooms was UV-light tingi, aroma , hairdryer-feel-alike, normal heat sauna, and the one that you pour water onto the charcoal.

I miss sauna-ing.

Oh, one thing I noticed about Hungarians. The youngsters have something against Chinese or Asians I think. Its so obvious. You can feel the difference of the service they give to us and the Caucasians. The elderly ones seems to be nicer. And I thought more educated people wont discriminate that much since they would have more knowledge etc and think it in a better wider perspective. Everywhere in the world, discrimination exist. Its such a pity to not understand ones culture by experiencing the culture itself.

Dont touch-touch their stuff also. They dont seem to be happy with people touching their things. You can immediately see it with their face expression. Try it! XD

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Oh Oh, if you ever-ever travel in Bayern area, try this route! Its the cheapest really! Salsburg , Vienna, Budapest then Prague and perhaps end at Munich, Germany. Best number to travel would be 4 - 5 people. From one country to another mentioned above, it can be as cheap as 6 € per person. WAhhh!! Sooo cheap right?

If you are looking for a bus, I highly recommend OrangeWays. Their seats are comfortable. Their staff is nice. They serve hot drinks. I loike Orangeways! Better a hundred times than Eurolines!!! Xp I hope no Eurolines staff saw this entry. Blek!! Like I care anyway.

Themepark!!

One day before heading to Budapest, the 6 Malaysians decided to go for a exciting thrill ride in Skyline Park which takes about 4 hours of train journey.The weather didnt smile with us as it drizzled throughout the day. Walking under the rain feels good though but I kinda caught a slight fever after that. What a time to catch a fever, a day before a vacation.

The rides were thrilling. The day was awesome.

A sneak preview of the rides available from afar (on the train):



Below are some of the rides we rode on that day.



The first pictar, the ship ride was WAH!! Especially on the way down. Eeeekk!! Scream your hearts out! I screamed like crazy to minimize my fear ^^

The one right below was my favourite of the day:

It turned and turned. My legs was floating up till the extend they bend as if I was stretching while sitting. Weeeeeeeee . I like the effect it has on me! =))

Next ride on the list was the Sky Shot. Always save the best for last right. XP
It took me some time to consider if I would actually go for this ride cos it looked so scary. (look at the second picture below and you will know why) It lets one experience the Spiderman jumps and turn-around acts. With my stomach feeling alil turned didnt help me much to decide. But I still took the challenge anyway.

Soooooo high rightttt?

Scary right? Right right right?

But it didnt scare me that much during the ride. Boo! I was expecting more. XD

There was some time when I laughed my heart out during the whole ride. Dont ask me why. The ride tickles my little funny bone I guess.

Sick Film

In Budapest I am at right now. Not gonna talk about Budapest but it is going to be about the movie I watched just now. "Crash" by David Coppenberg (not sure about the directors name). The story is from the novel though. My first experience watching a sick movie (for me at least). And of all times and places, now, in a hostel. OMG! +.+

The movie is about how some people just get sexually aroused by car crash and accidents. There were so many "scenes" in the movie, like every 10-20 minutes. All in the car or carpark. Something new for me, during a carwash. SWT.

Although I found it sick, but we watched it till the end. XP How ironic is that. XD

Hopefully the sun will shine really bright tomorrow!! ^^

I just realised this morning that I am turning darker! Lalala ~

Ist clear

After a short period, I finally know what it is recently. I am rather clear I think but I am still thinking if I would do it. It wont make a difference at this time anyway. But I want to let it out. Maybe I should just keep it to myself. Lets see how my courage is in the end.

This again? Let me think.

A Sunday

Am in disbelief I actually voluntereed to cook for a friend. XP. Alil upset I wont be able to see her off. So I spend as much time as I could with her. Memories is what will remain in my heart. Bidding goodbye is never easy especially when you know meeting together again ain´t easy.

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Last 24 hours, on a Sunday,

The day started with running after a bus. Waking up after a mere 6 hours of sleep. Its a Sunday!! Spring cleaning is here! Scrub the kitchen. Scrub the washroom. BOO! Indulging homecooked pasta. Napping like a dead zombee. Bowling which I almost killed Yan in the process. Oops. Eating local KFC. Meeting Ana for the last time before she leaves. Play crash position. Carried a freaking heavy vacumn back home which made my hands trembled after that. Vacumn-ing in the midst of night for the fun of it since there wasnt many people in Ave anymore.

I want to sleep with zombee style nap cos it felt so good.

Shake It

This is so addictive. While listening to this, I remember people back home dancing to it. 

Shake shake shake shake shake shake it! 

Spring Cleaning

What to do on a lovely Sunday? 

To actually start packing and clean the house thoroughly. Maid mode, here I come. 

Interesting talk

People from homogenous culture has a different way of thinking. Through a talk just now, I am really curious about the way they think. But these confusion could have occured due to language barrier and the way a person express themselves. We have to live in that culture and experience themselves to be able to understand it ourselves. 

Disagreement happens when you have different opinions and stands on things. It could be easy for a person to accept it but not for another. 

Loneliness - Marriage  - Living together  - Being honest - Problems - Acceptance in the society - Religion - Relationships 

Brave enuf?

The time to face reality is really near.

I dreamt of that reality last night but I dont seem to recall the midst of the dream. Only the end. I hope I dont crash or break down when I face it.

Sometimes I wish I could just not go home and not face it. But. A man got to do what he´s got to do.

Kebahagiaan

Came across this in a friends status and I smiled to myself thinking I guess I agree with it.

Quoting :

" The person who will walk with you for the rest of your life most probably will not be the person u love the most... I see that most of the time ppl won't be together with the person they love..and how u define love?? "

Love can be the best feeling in the world but it can be the ultimate thing in the world to bring a person down also.

Anyone would want to be with the person they love blablabla. Happy-ever-after ending feels so bahagia but not everyone is lucky to be in this bahagia state. Even if they did, the feeling wouldnt last forever. Forever is a long long time. Then again, if you have someone who is willing to walk with you for the rest of your life, think about it. Being loved is a bahagia thing.


Stayover again!! I love flooding rice with curry!! Weeeee. But my stomach seems to have some reaction this morning. A tiny lil pain. Hmmm, we had some pillow-talk last night. Sharing is not a problem as long as I am over it. I dont share everything , not if I am not over it. XD

That´s my rule of the game.